30 June 2009

Love pangs serve their purpose....

As per my daily horoscope tells... yes...the pangs and whams serve their purpose....for almost a month I have turned into someone that I myself do not know anymore... i turned into some crazy psycho woman who was subdued by anger under harsh circumstances, possesed by demon's crazy thoughts... I endured and suffered mental and emotional pain....

i am relieved now that it is over...( i hope it stays this way)...yes the love pangs serve their purpose... even my heart and mind is not as placid as it used to be before this, but at least I'm not a nutcase anymore.. am thankful enough for this...

Again, I hope it stays this way or even better than this....for a long long time...

17 June 2009

Time to reminiscent

Lately there're lotsa lotsa stuff , good and bad happens in my life.. I feel like giving up at 1 stage... my work, yes it was terrible, with those discrimination things going on, but it’s getting better ever since I found a way to resolve the situation... yes this is 1 good thing that happened...on the other hand, my personal life got stricken by some sad episodes.. And I'm taking this time to reminiscent, by having a time-off like this....We face issues, problems, failures that of course can be corrected if we believe and try as hard as possible to find the solution and to make some corrections... It is a good way of learning by going thru these curving roads.. 1 should take this time around to analyze those opportunities, chances and possible ways to resolve or correct such problems... I always do that. that is what I do @ my working place too...to resolve daily line issues. I take this time around to have deep thoughts, not by trying to avoid and pretend that nothing has ever happened to me... by trying to go around and find some other people who can make me feel better for a while...while my heart is telling me something else.... yes, for a while.. I am not sure abt other people, but I am not the kind who could do that...find some rebound person just to make me feel better... some other people would do that for sure, and I really admire them for having the capability to do that... I am not capable and I am really hurt deep down inside... and by rebound,what i mean is someone who u can turn to anytime anyday...like ur EX GFs/BFs, ur newly met workmates, ex-workmates, new acquaintances, any persons from the opposite sex.. hmm,maybe not just a rebound but really looking for someone new to start a new relationship by abandoning the previous failed/hanging-by-a-moment relationship....(as the problem still persists in your own self)......but for me, I still hang in there, trying not to make any rush decision, thinking of any possible solutions/chances...NOT finding rebound guys, and again I'm taking this time to reminiscent..NOT by pretending nothing has ever happened to me.........................

03 June 2009

POEM # 15: We

POEM # 15: We

Love starts beautifully,
We wished desperately,
That we’ll be together till eternity,
But things didn’t work out nicely,
We tried hardly,
To let things move peacefully,
To let things go smoothly,
We’d spent our life together happily,
But then our love ends…..…tragically.
~Ana ,'01~

POEM # 28: Anxiety

POEM # 28: Anxiety

I feel anxiety in myself,
I have a creepy mind,
I think I got fed up with this life,
I don’t know what I could find,

I start to shout out the pain,
The wound I got goes round and round again.
Wanna set this situation away,
But there’s nothing I could say.

02 June 2009

To Comprehend

frazzle seems my life is
and i've got no decent strength to fight this
i take a look on my left and right
there's no one by my side

I finally see
each year passed by
the days I underwent
makes me think of something to comprehend

I walked through those roads
each step i've taken
leads to astray
and i know they brought me to no where

I finally see
each year passed by
the days I underwent
makes me think of something to comprehend